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guinevere
07-06-2003, 03:28 PM
I didn't write these but some of them are quite funny (and some a little scarey-I can see of them doing these things - I think I HAVE seen some of them do some of these things)

20 Fun Things to do if you're an Ice Hockey Goalie
1. One word: Salt.
2. Before the game, secretly switch the green and red light bulbs around.
3. Slash, hook, and spear every opposing player who comes within 3 feet of your crease, then point and laugh at your teammates when they have to go to the box for you.
4. After you cover the puck and the ref blows the whistle, quickly put the puck in your shorts before the ref can pick it up, then tell him to "come get it."
5. Moon the goal cam.
6. Get into a shouting match with your stick, then tell the ref you refuse to play until the stick apologizes. (So Roy like)
7. If you're on the bench, start giving away all the sticks on the rack to the fans sitting behind you.
8. Every time an announcement is made over the PA system, drop you your knees and start screaming, "Not the voices again!"
9. Every time the opposing team scores, remove one piece of of your equipment.
10. Fill your teammates' water bottles with vodka and watch the fun.
11. As soon as the trainers finish putting your equipment on you, say out loud, "Hey, you know what astronauts can do right in their suits?" Then watch the fun as they scramble to pull the equipment off again.
12. During a faceoff, stand next to your defensemen as if you're a skater too.
13. When someone scores a hat trick, grabs as many hats off the ice as you can and stuff them in your jersey.
14. Using hockey tape, put a large bullseye in the middle of your chest.
15. Using hockey tape, put "(Insert name of opponent's enforcer here) Sucks" on the back of your teammates' jerseys.
16. Rub Ben Gay on the inside of your teammates' cups
17. Pour Crazy Glue inside your teammates' cups
18. When the trainer isn't looking, throw a red sock in the washer with the white home jerseys (but make sure you take yours out!)
19. Before the game starts, go up to the opposing team, start crying and say, "Please don't score on me! My coach beats me if I let a puck in!" Then,when the ref comes to take you back to your crease, start screaming, "No! I don't wanna go! I don't wanna go!"
20. Position yourself in front of the goal cam and proceed to scratch your rear end.


Guin

Stormbringer
07-06-2003, 03:33 PM
http://www.gamers-forums.com/smilies/otn/realhappy/xxrotflmao.gif

Excellent Guin...much better than anything Letterman has these days. http://websmileys.bei.t-online.de/div20.gif

RIO
07-06-2003, 03:47 PM
#11. :D heh....

Shell
07-06-2003, 04:03 PM
LOL, those are great!

Turbulence
07-06-2003, 04:10 PM
16 & 17.... :sick:

:laugh: Good ones!

RIO
07-06-2003, 04:15 PM
16 & 17.... :sick:

:laugh: Good ones!


you've been indulging in heroin chicken again.... :crazy:

Jeff O Rocks
07-06-2003, 04:18 PM
I love 4 and 5 ...and 9 could be QUITE interesting!!!!!!! :crazy: :laugh:

SouthernHockeyChick
07-06-2003, 04:45 PM
LMAO Guin!!

I think I've seen Weekes and Irbe both pretty much do #12 a few times. If you are gonna let the puck in off the face-off anyway you might as well be standing next to the defenseman. :roll: And #3 is an Eddie Belfour special. ;)

Kat
07-06-2003, 04:48 PM
14. Using hockey tape, put a large bullseye in the middle of your chest.


Some goalie that plays pickup at the IcePlex actually has two jerseys with a Target-esqe bullseye silkscreened onto the front. It is rather amusing.

-Kat

SouthernHockeyChick
07-06-2003, 04:51 PM
You know, the swirl on our jerseys is pretty much a big target. This past season prove it. :cry:

tommy
07-06-2003, 05:29 PM
LOL @ #6

1Irbegirlforever
07-06-2003, 09:16 PM
Thanks Guin! I loved it!!! :D :D :D

Jeff O Rocks
07-06-2003, 09:30 PM
LOL @ #6

I agree tommy....Roy is weird...ALL goalies in general are odd...the way they talk to themselves and shake their heads...We always laugh at Weeksey when he is in goal in front of us..during time outs, he carries on a full conversation with himself...must be lonely being a goalie!! :crazy: but I have to say Patrick was the craziest!! :eek:

Stormbringer
07-06-2003, 10:34 PM
LOL @ #6

I agree tommy....Roy is weird...ALL goalies in general are odd...the way they talk to themselves and shake their heads...We always laugh at Weeksey when he is in goal in front of us..during time outs, he carries on a full conversation with himself...must be lonely being a goalie!! :crazy: but I have to say Patrick was the craziest!! :eek:

Maybe that's why goalies are not allowed to be captains anymore... :crazy: ;)

Speaking of that, what is the *real* reason behind goalies supposedly not allowed to be captains anymore?

nccanes
07-06-2003, 10:40 PM
Speaking of that, what is the *real* reason behind goalies supposedly not allowed to be captains anymore?

I thought one of the reasons was that they are "stuck" at the end of the ice, and it could be time consuming for them to have to skate to the official(s) to discuss a call, etc. Similarly, they may be too removed from the action to be an appropriate observer to the play(s) in question.

I could see goalies that team-wise make sense to be captains theorectically, but sound like a bad idea from a practical standpoint.

Shell
07-06-2003, 11:01 PM
well, it is true goalies can't be captains, as written in No playing Coach or playing Manager or goalkeeper shall be permitted to act as Captain or Alternate Captain.
as far as why,
Hi, Adrian. Do the players or the coaches decide who will be the captain and assistant captains of the team? Do the captain and assistants have any specific responsibilities? I'm also curious why goalies are never captains or assistants. Patrick Roy is a clear leader of the Avs and would seem to be a natural pick for one of these positions. Thanks!
-- Debbie, Boston

Yes, basically the players decide among themselves who should be captains, but coaches sometimes give their input, too. A captain's responsibility on the ice is to consult with referees on behalf of the team, whenever something needs to be understood from the refs. The reason goalies can't be captains is the extra skating time it would take for them to leave their nets to consult with refs at center ice. Basically, the league doesn't want goalies doing that much work during a game. John Lindsay, Hamilton Ont. 11yrs old: Why are goalies not choosen as CAPTAIN of the team on the ice? You are definetly CAPTAIN off the ice!

Curtis Joseph : A captain's main responsibility is to talk to the ref. As you goalie you can go out too far from your crease, so it makes sense that the goalies aren't captains.

HockeyFan
07-06-2003, 11:26 PM
AHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAhAHAAHAHAHA!! !!!!!!!! (<<That's a lot of HAHA's! ) but it was great!!! :beatup: :spin: :smoke:

Alicia
07-07-2003, 03:59 AM
LMAO!! http://tridead.net/canes/images/smilies/rofl.gif